Abstract

The following analysis is a reflection (tadabbur) on the (Abu Huraira رضي الله عنه) narration in which the Prophet ﷺ said, “He (a Muslim) who dies of an abdominal disease is a martyr, and he who dies of plague is a martyr.”

Although this piece draws from both scholarly discussion and established medical concepts, the content written is a personalized reflection, not tafsir. The purpose of the study is to invite deeper contemplation of the human body, and to restore our conscientious spiritual wonder. It is not to legalize interpretation, nor argue authoritative interpretation.

In the following study I will reflect on the suffering of Prophet Ayyub (عليه السلام) , the medical connections between the gut-brain axis and how this invites spiritual contemplation, gluttony vs starvation, and finally I will argue illness though experienced as suffering - can itself become a form of rizq and a potential gateway toward Jannah.

Introduction

I want to begin the study with a story of man.

Before modern medicine, imagine a man being inflicted with a disease that completely distorted his body. Skin lesions, nerve thickening and palsy - destroying your ability to sense and function. Then consider this man’s story so profound that Allah preserved his story for every generation that would follow.

This is the story of Prophet Ayyub (عليه السلام). The crux of his journey is that he was never aware of why he was given his illness. He did not deny his suffering. He brought it to Allah. He acknowledged his physical and social suffering without accusation. But Ayyub (عليه السلام) taught us that suffering can exist without bitterness.

Gut-Brain Axis

• In 2021 a study by Kim et al. Researchers transferred gut bacteria from Alzheimer-type infected mice into healthy young mice.¹

• In 2023 a study by Zhang et al. Researchers housed healthy young mice into the same cage as Alzheimer-type mice.²

• In 2023 a study by Grabrucker et al. Researchers transferred gut bacteria from people with Alzheimer’s Disease into healthy young mice.³

What was concluded?

• The study demonstrated that unhealthy gut bacteria alone, without any genetic predisposition in the healthy young mice, could trigger changes resembling Alzheimer’s.

• As healthy and sick mice naturally began to share bacteria within their communal environment (grooming, shared bedding ect) - the healthy mice picked up the Alzheimer's-associated microbiota. Even more notably, researchers found that the spouses of Alzheimer’s patients had gut bacteria that looked more like the affected partner’s than the likes of those of healthy individuals. Arguing a sort of dysbiotic bacteria spread through shared living environments.

• After the transfer of gut, rats began having trouble with memory and learning. Notably, worse the human donor’s dementia was - worse the rats performed.

Nourishment and Rizq

In Islam we don’t consider nourishment as merely mechanical provision. Repeatedly we are reminded to consider what we consume, how much we consume, and to consider whether what enters us is under His blessing. It is not merely satisfaction of hunger - it is spiritual provision, gratitude, moderation and purification.

The scholars describe creation as being in continual need of divine support, for “the creature is in need of its Lord in its existence, its survival, and its benefit and harm”. Every cell in your brain ultimately depends upon things you didn’t create. Every heartbeat depends on substrates you didn’t create. Your nervous system depends on oxygen you didn’t create. Ibn al-Qayyim wrote that the body lives through food and drink, while the heart lives through faith, knowledge of Allah, love of Him, and remembrance of Him. So our existence is not self-sustained—it is a constant receiving from Allah: He feeds, gives oxygen, maintains cells, directs circulation, and preserves the soul.

“And in yourselves—will you not then see?”

Surah Adh-Dhariyat (51:20-21)

Today, we have a tendency to disregard nourishment as a form of rizq. We are so focused on worldly desires that we over consume food. Everything is ostentatious. Foolishly thinking what we love is what Allah loves. We ignore that we could be conduits, giving rizq to others - simply by providing food and water.

Recently, we have watched children starve through screens while eating our own meals. We have watched children become thinner while our appetite became wider. The distance between their hunger and our abundance.

What does it mean to call something rizq when we possess more than enough, while another human being possesses almost nothing?

On the Day of Judgment, Allah will ask a person: "O son of Adam, I asked you for food and you did not feed Me." The person will reply in shock: "O Lord, how could I feed You when You are the Lord of the Worlds?" Allah will then answer: "Did you not know that My servant so-and-so asked you for food and you did not feed him? Did you not know that had you fed him, you would have found that reward with Me?"

Perhaps nourishment was never meant to be something we merely receive. Perhaps nourishment was a divine gift we received and could give to others. Rizq given is rizq provided.

Illness and Rizq

Polyphagia. Hyperphagia. Obesity. Starvation. Marasmus. Celiac Disease. Diabetes. Ulcerative Colitis. Crohn’s. Gastroparesis. GIST. Colorectal Cancer. Gastric Adenocarcinoma. GERD. Lactose intolerance. Peptic Ulcer. Scurvy. Kworshikov.

We give these conditions names because medicine must name what the body suffers - but it does not define the existential definition of suffering.

So what do we call the suffering itself? what is illness? is it a test? is it hardship? is it rizq?

I think illness is so much more that what we superficially perceive it as. Perhaps a gateway toward Jannah. A connection between you and your Lord. Your Rabb. And when He bestows hardship in health upon you, perhaps it is not punishment nor defect - For the believer, illness can become a means of purification, intimacy with Allah, and elevation. And like Ayyub (عليه السلام), a believer may discover through their suffering a path towards Paradise.

The road to Allah is not long. It is one moment of pain. It is one moment of reflection. Do not be fooled by internet trends. Rizq is not tied to ten thousand istighfar on a digital ring counter - it can be a single moment of awareness to your Lord, a definitive moment that turned your heart.

___________

“In the Quran you never see the word Rahmani - my Rahman. You never see the word Ilahi, you never see Maliki - my King, you never see it…

But you see Rabbi. My Rabb. Why is that? Because this is the most personal name of Allah. This is the name of Allah that is most close to you. The only name you can attribute to yourself…

And you can say, it's mine - because He is your Lord. He is your caretaker. He is your nurturer. He looks after you. He is the one who provides for you…

He is yours.”

Ustadh Hisham Abu Yusuf

__________

Medical References:

1. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/37849234
2. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/34500036
3. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/37604976

Siddiq Tayeb Al-Minshawi 1895-1984 Rahimullah-May Allah have mercy on him ( the First one reciting is the Father of Muhammad siddiq Al Minshawi rahimullah )

Mhhammad siddiq Al Minshaw Rahimullah-May Allah have mercy on him 1920-1969 ( The son ) is the second one reciting

We never got to see hadiths containing their sweetest life moments of 25 years, but still others showing this scream his love for her stayed forever pure and irreplaceable.

Just imagine, we got Hadiths this strong after her death, how romantic and beautiful their personal life would be if there was someone to personally witness it and wrote it like Mother Aisha did herself. But I'm glad she confirmed his love for her regardless her positive jealousy..😭🤌🏻🩷

Ali 'Imran (3:188-200)
بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
3:188
لَا تَحْسَبَنَّ ٱلَّذِينَ يَفْرَحُونَ بِمَآ أَتَوا۟ وَّيُحِبُّونَ أَن يُحْمَدُوا۟ بِمَا لَمْ يَفْعَلُوا۟ فَلَا تَحْسَبَنَّهُم بِمَفَازَةٍۢ مِّنَ ٱلْعَذَابِ ۖ وَلَهُمْ عَذَابٌ أَلِيمٌۭ ١٨٨
Do not let those who rejoice in their misdeeds and love to take credit for what they have not done think they will escape torment. They will suffer a painful punishment.

3:189
وَلِلَّهِ مُلْكُ ٱلسَّمَـٰوَٰتِ وَٱلْأَرْضِ ۗ وَٱللَّهُ عَلَىٰ كُلِّ شَىْءٍۢ قَدِيرٌ ١٨٩
To Allah ˹alone˺ belongs the kingdom of the heavens and the earth. And Allah is Most Capable of everything.

3:190
إِنَّ فِى خَلْقِ ٱلسَّمَـٰوَٰتِ وَٱلْأَرْضِ وَٱخْتِلَـٰفِ ٱلَّيْلِ وَٱلنَّهَارِ لَـَٔايَـٰتٍۢ لِّأُو۟لِى ٱلْأَلْبَـٰبِ ١٩٠
Indeed, in the creation of the heavens and the earth and the alternation of the day and night there are signs for people of reason.

3:191
ٱلَّذِينَ يَذْكُرُونَ ٱللَّهَ قِيَـٰمًۭا وَقُعُودًۭا وَعَلَىٰ جُنُوبِهِمْ وَيَتَفَكَّرُونَ فِى خَلْقِ ٱلسَّمَـٰوَٰتِ وَٱلْأَرْضِ رَبَّنَا مَا خَلَقْتَ هَـٰذَا بَـٰطِلًۭا سُبْحَـٰنَكَ فَقِنَا عَذَابَ ٱلنَّارِ ١٩١
˹They are˺ those who remember Allah while standing, sitting, and lying on their sides, and reflect on the creation of the heavens and the earth ˹and pray˺, “Our Lord! You have not created ˹all of˺ this without purpose. Glory be to You! Protect us from the torment of the Fire.

3:192
رَبَّنَآ إِنَّكَ مَن تُدْخِلِ ٱلنَّارَ فَقَدْ أَخْزَيْتَهُۥ ۖ وَمَا لِلظَّـٰلِمِينَ مِنْ أَنصَارٍۢ ١٩٢
Our Lord! Indeed, those You commit to the Fire will be ˹completely˺ disgraced! And the wrongdoers will have no helpers.

3:193
رَّبَّنَآ إِنَّنَا سَمِعْنَا مُنَادِيًۭا يُنَادِى لِلْإِيمَـٰنِ أَنْ ءَامِنُوا۟ بِرَبِّكُمْ فَـَٔامَنَّا ۚ رَبَّنَا فَٱغْفِرْ لَنَا ذُنُوبَنَا وَكَفِّرْ عَنَّا سَيِّـَٔاتِنَا وَتَوَفَّنَا مَعَ ٱلْأَبْرَارِ ١٩٣
Our Lord! We have heard the caller to ˹true˺ belief, ˹proclaiming,˺ ‘Believe in your Lord ˹alone˺,’ so we believed. Our Lord! Forgive our sins, absolve us of our misdeeds, and join us with the virtuous when we die‎.

3:194
رَبَّنَا وَءَاتِنَا مَا وَعَدتَّنَا عَلَىٰ رُسُلِكَ وَلَا تُخْزِنَا يَوْمَ ٱلْقِيَـٰمَةِ ۗ إِنَّكَ لَا تُخْلِفُ ٱلْمِيعَادَ ١٩٤
Our Lord! Grant us what You have promised us through Your messengers and do not put us to shame on Judgment Day—for certainly You never fail in Your promise.”

3:195
فَٱسْتَجَابَ لَهُمْ رَبُّهُمْ أَنِّى لَآ أُضِيعُ عَمَلَ عَـٰمِلٍۢ مِّنكُم مِّن ذَكَرٍ أَوْ أُنثَىٰ ۖ بَعْضُكُم مِّنۢ بَعْضٍۢ ۖ فَٱلَّذِينَ هَاجَرُوا۟ وَأُخْرِجُوا۟ مِن دِيَـٰرِهِمْ وَأُوذُوا۟ فِى سَبِيلِى وَقَـٰتَلُوا۟ وَقُتِلُوا۟ لَأُكَفِّرَنَّ عَنْهُمْ سَيِّـَٔاتِهِمْ وَلَأُدْخِلَنَّهُمْ جَنَّـٰتٍۢ تَجْرِى مِن تَحْتِهَا ٱلْأَنْهَـٰرُ ثَوَابًۭا مِّنْ عِندِ ٱللَّهِ ۗ وَٱللَّهُ عِندَهُۥ حُسْنُ ٱلثَّوَابِ ١٩٥
So their Lord responded to them: “I will never deny any of you—male or female—the reward of your deeds. Both are equal in reward. Those who migrated or were expelled from their homes, and were persecuted for My sake and fought and ˹some˺ were martyred—I will certainly forgive their sins and admit them into Gardens under which rivers flow, as a reward from Allah. And with Allah is the finest reward!”

3:196
لَا يَغُرَّنَّكَ تَقَلُّبُ ٱلَّذِينَ كَفَرُوا۟ فِى ٱلْبِلَـٰدِ ١٩٦
Do not be deceived by the prosperity of the disbelievers throughout the land.

3:197
مَتَـٰعٌۭ قَلِيلٌۭ ثُمَّ مَأْوَىٰهُمْ جَهَنَّمُ ۚ وَبِئْسَ ٱلْمِهَادُ ١٩٧
It is only a brief enjoyment. Then Hell will be their home—what an evil place to rest!

3:198
لَـٰكِنِ ٱلَّذِينَ ٱتَّقَوْا۟ رَبَّهُمْ لَهُمْ جَنَّـٰتٌۭ تَجْرِى مِن تَحْتِهَا ٱلْأَنْهَـٰرُ خَـٰلِدِينَ فِيهَا نُزُلًۭا مِّنْ عِندِ ٱللَّهِ ۗ وَمَا عِندَ ٱللَّهِ خَيْرٌۭ لِّلْأَبْرَارِ ١٩٨
But those who are mindful of their Lord will be in Gardens under which rivers flow, to stay there forever—as an accommodation from Allah. And what is with Allah is best for the virtuous.

3:199
وَإِنَّ مِنْ أَهْلِ ٱلْكِتَـٰبِ لَمَن يُؤْمِنُ بِٱللَّهِ وَمَآ أُنزِلَ إِلَيْكُمْ وَمَآ أُنزِلَ إِلَيْهِمْ خَـٰشِعِينَ لِلَّهِ لَا يَشْتَرُونَ بِـَٔايَـٰتِ ٱللَّهِ ثَمَنًۭا قَلِيلًا ۗ أُو۟لَـٰٓئِكَ لَهُمْ أَجْرُهُمْ عِندَ رَبِّهِمْ ۗ إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ سَرِيعُ ٱلْحِسَابِ ١٩٩
Indeed, there are some among the People of the Book who truly believe in Allah and what has been revealed to you ˹believers˺ and what was revealed to them. They humble themselves before Allah—never trading Allah’s revelations for a fleeting gain. Their reward is with their Lord. Surely Allah is swift in reckoning.

3:200
يَـٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُوا۟ ٱصْبِرُوا۟ وَصَابِرُوا۟ وَرَابِطُوا۟ وَٱتَّقُوا۟ ٱللَّهَ لَعَلَّكُمْ تُفْلِحُونَ ٢٠٠
O believers! Patiently endure, persevere, stand on guard, and be mindful of Allah, so you may be successful.

Salam everyone,

For those of you living in the UK I have an important message.

There has always been Anti Muslim hatred from the far right in this country but recently it’s increasing and becoming normalised particularly across social media and within parts of mainstream political discussion.

We are seeing Islam attacked repeatedly often through nonsensical claims, misinformation and statements about Muslims that literally have no basis in the Quran or Sunnah.

One prominent example of a despicable liar is Rupert Lowe the leader of Restore Britain whose rhetoric about Islam and Muslims has attracted a growing audience. He has made ridiculous statements such as suggesting that Muslims view non Muslim women who dress immodestly as “meat” among other claims which completely misrepresent Islamic teachings. His followers are the same sheep who are in Tommy Robinson’s camp.

Another despicable liar is Elon Musk who is funding Rupert Lowe and other islamophobes to spread lies and misinformation about our religion and Muslims in general. This is the same trillionaire who a few weeks ago was asked if he’s anti Muslim and could not answer. His involvement in British far right politics is becoming a great concern.

The reason I’m raising this is in my own city and from accounts I have heard elsewhere muslim women wearing hijab or niqab are experiencing verbal abuse and even physical abuse. Muslim men who are simply going about their daily lives have also faced hostility and are being attacked physically. Just a few weeks ago I know a brother who was assaulted in a park with his daughter because a far right thug accused him of being a predator!

We should not respond by becoming reckless or aggressive. Our first response should always be sabr, good character and where possible peaceful de escalation.

However at the same time we cannot let these thugs bully us and attack our brothers and sisters. There is nothing wrong with being physically capable of protecting yourself and your family if you are ever threatened. Thats why I encourage brothers and sisters who are able to do so to start learning a legitimate combat sport such as MMA or wrestling or another form of self defence to build the ability to protect yourself.

My advice to everyone is to make dua to Allah for protection, stick firmly to the Quran and Sunnah, strengthen your relationship with Allah, learn how to protect yourself responsibly, support one another, remain united and stay away from sins and unnecessary conflict. And don’t forget we have Allah the almighty on our side. For these enemies of Islam is a painful punishment in the afterlife.

May Allah protect our brothers, sisters, families and communities, keep us firm upon the truth, and grant us safety, wisdom and unity. Ameen.

my mum and dad had a love marriage, their marriage was perfect. my dad loves and spoils us a lot and gets us everything we ever wanted and he does the same with my mum. when i was 5 he cheated on my mother so i grew up with a lot of fights in the household. later when we grew a bit older my mum gave him the choice of either choosing that woman or my mum. he chose my mum and divorced that woman (talak) infront of his whole family and relatives. however even after that they are still together, maybe they remarried. i’ve cried to my dad so much and begged him to leave her but he started flaunting her to other people which is embarrassing to me, my mother doesn’t leave my dad bcs she grew up without a father and she doesn’t want us to grow up without a dad either. people say my dad is under some kind of spell. what can a person do to get their dad back?

To act like Muslims don’t get the short end of the stick and specifically Brown Muslims/Muslim adjacent people is insane to me. It’s been pissing me off so much. Why is it that people who hate Islam always hate people from the Middle East, Pakistan, Afghanistan, and the desi/South Asian countries. I never see anyone complain about people from Azerbaijan, Uzbekistan, Tajikistan, Turkmenistan, Kyrgyzstan, Kazakhstan, Malaysia, Indonesia, Brunei, Albania, or Bosnia.

People always say “Poland is the best country in Europe because they don’t let in Muslims.” Yes they do and they gather around for an Afghan rapper who talks about some shake shake shake shake shake belly dance. They let in central Asian Muslims and it’s alright I guess. Occasionally I see people say bad things about Uighurs, or any of Russia’s ethnic groups (as if other ethnic groups in China or Russia aren’t allowed to exist and aren’t just as native) but that’s only if they’re culturally and historically endowed.

Really don’t know what else to add but just getting something off my chest. If people have any valid theological reasons to hate Islam or whatever I genuinely don’t care it’s whatever.

The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said: "Allah took the covenant from the back of Adam at Na'man (i.e., Arafat). He brought forth from his loins all his offspring who would be created until the Day of Resurrection, spread them out before Him, and spoke to them face-to-face, saying: 'Am I not your Lord?' They replied: 'Yes, we testify!'"

Source: Al-Tirmidhi | Tafsir of Surah al-Araf | ayah:172 | Hasan

Narrated by Ibn Abbas (RA): When Uyaynah ibn Hisn came to Medina and spoke harshly to the Caliph Umar ibn al-Khattab (RA), Hurr ibn Qays recited this verse (7:199) to Umar. Upon hearing this verse, Umar stopped immediately and did not react with anger, as he was strict in adhering to the Book of Allah.

Source: Al-Bukhari | Tafsīr of Surah al-Araf | ayah:199

التفسير: ﴿وَ﴾ اذكر ﴿یَوۡمَ تُسَیَّرُ ٱلۡجِبَالُ﴾ يُذْهَب بِهَا عَنْ وَجْه الْأَرْض فَتَصِير هَبَاء مُنْبَثًّا وَفِي قِرَاءَة بِالنُّونِ وَكَسْرِ الْيَاء وَنَصْب «ٱلۡجِبَال» ﴿وَتَرَى ٱلۡأَرۡضَ بَارِزَةࣰ﴾ ظَاهِرَة لَيْسَ عَلَيْهَا شَيْء مِنْ جَبَل وَلَا غَيْره ﴿وَحَشَرۡنَـٰهُمۡ﴾ المؤمنين والكافرين ﴿فَلَمۡ نُغَادِرۡ﴾ نترك ﴿مِنۡهُمۡ أَحَدࣰا ٤٧﴾

﴿وَعُرِضُوا۟ عَلَىٰ رَبِّكَ صَفࣰّا﴾ حَال أَيْ مُصْطَفِّينَ كُلّ أُمَّة صَفّ وَيُقَال لَهُمْ ﴿لَّقَدۡ جِئۡتُمُونَا كَمَا خَلَقۡنَـٰكُمۡ أَوَّلَ مَرَّةِۭۚ﴾ أَيْ فُرَادَى حُفَاة عُرَاة غُرْلًا وَيُقَال لِمُنْكِرِي الْبَعْث ﴿بَلۡ زَعَمۡتُمۡ أَ﴾ن مُخَفَّفَة مِنْ الثَّقِيلَة أَيْ أَنَّهُ ﴿لَّن نَّجۡعَلَ لَكُم مَّوۡعِدࣰا ٤٨﴾ لِلْبَعْثِ

﴿وَوُضِعَ ٱلۡكِتَـٰبُ﴾ كِتَاب كُلّ امْرِئٍ فِي يَمِينه مِنْ الْمُؤْمِنِينَ وَفِي شِمَاله مِنْ الْكَافِرِينَ ﴿فَتَرَى ٱلۡمُجۡرِمِینَ﴾ الْكَافِرِينَ ﴿مُشۡفِقِینَ﴾ خَائِفِينَ ﴿مِمَّا فِیهِ وَیَقُولُونَ﴾ عِنْد مُعَايَنَتهمْ مَا فِيهِ مِنْ السَّيِّئَات ﴿یَـٰ﴾ لِلتَّنْبِيهِ ﴿وَیۡلَتَنَا﴾ هَلَكَتنَا وَهُوَ مَصْدَر لَا فِعْل له من لفظ ﴿مَالِ هَـٰذَا ٱلۡكِتَـٰبِ لَا یُغَادِرُ صَغِیرَةࣰ وَلَا كَبِیرَةً﴾ مِنْ ذُنُوبنَا ﴿إِلَّاۤ أَحۡصَىٰهَاۚ﴾ عَدَّهَا وَأَثْبَتَهَا تَعَجَّبُوا مِنْهُ فِي ذَلِكَ ﴿وَوَجَدُوا۟ مَا عَمِلُوا۟ حَاضِرࣰاۗ﴾ مُثْبَتًا فِي كِتَابهمْ ﴿وَلَا یَظۡلِمُ رَبُّكَ أَحَدࣰا ٤٩﴾ لَا يُعَاقِبهُ بِغَيْرِ جُرْم وَلَا يَنْقُص مِنْ ثَوَاب مُؤْمِن

Allah tells us of the terrors of the Day of Resurrection, and the awesome things that will come to pass, as He says: ˹Beware of˺ the Day We will blow the mountains away, and you will see the earth laid bare. And We will gather all ˹humankind˺, leaving none behind. They will be presented before your Lord in rows, ˹and the deniers will be told,˺ “You have surely returned to Us ˹all alone˺ as We created you the first time, although you ˹always˺ claimed that We would never appoint a time for your return.” And the record ˹of deeds˺ will be laid ˹open˺, and you will see the wicked in fear of what is ˹written˺ in it. They will cry, “Woe to us! What kind of record is this that does not leave any sin, small or large, unlisted?” They will find whatever they did present ˹before them˺. And your Lord will never wrong anyone.

I just need somewhere to put these thoughts because they've been sitting inside me for too long.

Before anyone worries, I'm not planning to kill myself. I won't do it. Suicide is haram, and I fear Allah and the Hellfire. I know taking my own life isn't the answer.

But sometimes I wish Allah would simply call me back Himself.

That's the part I don't know how to explain. I think about death and sometimes, instead of being afraid, I feel relieved.

I imagine Allah calling me back, as if telling the angels, "My servant has become too tired. Take his soul."

And I smile.

The thought of finally leaving all of this behind, finally resting, finally returning to the One who created me feels comforting.

Sometimes I think about Allah knowing me by my name.

The Creator of everything. The King of Kings. The One who created the entire universe, yet He knows that I exist. He knows my name. He knows every thought I hide, every tear nobody sees, every mistake I've made, every moment I've felt alone.

I'm so insignificant compared to everything He created, yet He knows me.

That thought makes me smile harder than I can explain.

But then I think, "What if I'm not ready?"

I have sins. I've wasted so much time. My iman goes up and down. I've neglected things I shouldn't have. I haven't become the person I wanted to become. If Allah called me back today, I don't feel like I've done enough to deserve Jannah.

So I'm stuck between two feelings.

I'm afraid of dying because I don't know what awaits me.

And I'm tired of living because I don't know how much more pain I can take.

I'm only 25. People tell you that you're young and have your whole life ahead of you, but sometimes that thought scares me. I think about how much more I might have to endure and I just feel exhausted.

I don't want to die by my own hand. I don't want to disobey Allah.

I just want the pain to end.

Genuinely, this dunya has exhausted me. The constant rat race. Never getting what you wanted. Being used, disappointed, and feeling like nobody truly wants something good for you. Chasing money, status, success, relationships, and everything else we're told will make us happy, only to still feel empty.

I feel detached from all of it.

I don't want this dunya anymore.

I just want to go home.

I just want to go back to Him.

I know I need sabr. I know Allah's mercy is greater than my sins. I know life is a test.

I know all of that.

I'm just tired.

Inna lillahi wa inna ilayhi raji'un.

Al-salam wa alaykom brothers and sisters

I'm hoping for some advice, it's been a difficult period reconciling my Islamic faith and becoming more politically aware since the genocide in Gaza unfolded.

This is not a sectarian message at all, I'm just really ashamed to watch a genocide unfold for 3 years and 2 billion Muslims stand by idly as it happened live on our screens.

How do you separate the two aspects of our lives, our faith in Allah (swt) is the ultimate test and inshAllah it never wavers but how do we call ourselves an Ummah when we watch the death and destruction of our people and then shake hands with the ones doing the killing and give them billions of dollars.

Al salam alaykom,

I’m a fresh software engineering graduate and I’m currently trying to find my first job abroad in the Middle East. I’ve applied to a lot of jobs but honestly I’m getting pretty much no responses.

My family has a business, and they told me I can put on my CV that I worked there as IT support for a few years to help me get a job.

The thing is, I have helped them with IT stuff before, but very little. Maybe 2–3 times a year they would call me if they had some computer/IT problem and ask me how to fix it. Other than that, I barely did anything because they didn’t really need IT support, and I was also abroad for a lot of the time.

I asked them directly if they actually needed someone for IT, and they said no. They basically told me, “Why waste your time doing something we don’t need? Just put it on your CV, we don’t mind.”

I’m just not comfortable with it from an Islamic perspective. If I say I worked as IT support for 1-2 years, when in reality I only helped them occasionally, isn’t that lying?

At the same time, I’m struggling to get my foot in the door. I have a degree, I’ve applied to many positions and I’m getting nowhere. So part of me is thinking maybe I should just do what my family is suggesting and try to get that first opportunity.

What do you think? Would this be considered problematic from an Islamic point of view?