Although the porn is gone, I'm starting to feel less excited and kinda sad each day. Or maybe it's a less edgier state that the mind is just not accustomed to yet. Or maybe it's just a sad day, I don't know. Earlier this year I went 94 days w/o P before relapsing for a month, and then had to start again from scratch. That's almost 6 months in total. I feel sorta scared because of the fact that I'm changing - almost existential - as if my identity is threatened or something. I pray to whatever God is out there to give me the strength to go the full length, because deep down it feels like the only way out is through. I must zoom my car through the dark tunnel, even if it feels longer and darker, towards the light at the end. I must learn to accept change, even if it means that I need to recalibrate the way I am. It helps to articulate these thoughts and post it here though. (Note to self: prayer is important.)

Wondering if anybody else has developed ridiculous opinions about themselves, other people, etc..

I was exposed to porn when I was young, and I've had an addiction since then. A lot of the pornography that I consumed always had somebody being degraded or humiliated. It's always for a different reason; maybe they're out of shape, maybe they're ugly, maybe they're more feminine presenting, etc.

What made my addiction especially damaging was that whenever I had any issues in my life - whether it was external, like somebody bullying me, or some sort of insecurity I had, like issues with my body or appearance - porn would always make those problems worse and make me feel worse about myself. Looking back, I had some ridiculous views about relationships between men and women, what determines somebody's value, and my own image. It sounds so ridiculous now to think that so much of my belief system and worldview came from porn use. My whole concept of sex was completely detached from intimacy.

I don't think this is a very common experience (at least to the extent of a significant part of your worldview being the result of porn addiction), and I don't expect that many people to relate. I haven't really seen that much discussion about this sort of experience online, which is why I'm making this post. Hoping the best for anybody recovering from their addiction, it's worth the struggle to no longer think like this ever again.

Hope I can kick this habit for life this time. I am autistic, have struggled to connect with people, and have been addicted since adolescence. I also have OCD, which meant my final watch cannot have any intrusive thoughts which means I have to keep trying again by watching again hopefully I will "forget to" have an intrusive thought.

I only watched vanilla stuff, but so often. Many failed attempts, including therapy and meds, player, I think I have found my solution. Hope this streak lasts a lifelong. No excuses, I got my lucky break of a no intrusive thoughts session and I will stick with it. On 12th Dec, i will make my 100th day porn free post here.

Just a reminder to you all that you can do this. You can overcome this affliction or addiction or whatever you call it. You will be liberated. Close your eyes and think about a future where porn is no longer something that impacts you negatively. Do you feel the warmth? In a moment of urge, go back to that warmth, that liberated emotion.

It won’t be easy, and it won’t be a straight line, but you will ultimately be able to fill your life with other, more rewarding things. You have to start somewhere, day by day. Take care guys and don’t be too hard on yourselves.

For context, I barely even know how to use an iPhone. I have always had a Samsung and even with paid blocking apps, I've found workarounds to get them disabled. Does apple's native screen time blocks (or with the use of 3rd party apps), become near impenetrable? In people's experience.

I went thru the deletion of my pornhub account but it says it will send me another email within 2 weeks to go with the deletion process of my account. I had to confirm my email address, but it justs says my request is under process.

Normally I would’ve had grayscale on and turn my devices off all day during the day if I knew I’d have urges, but I had to help someone out and I didn’t want to explain why I have grayscale on my phone or why it’s turned off. Because I had multiple barriers down on top of getting home late + a stressful day it was evident I relapsed. Now I feel like a failure cause I was making good progress. Oh well.

Just joined this community and I wanna leave 🌽 for good I'm going to be 18 this month and want to do things which are good for me and my health and everyone around me and quitting this shi is first imo and kinda the hardest ... Help me anyone you all more experienced it's my Day 1 ✨ let's say

But, lately I've been falling back into it again, using it more and more, and it's not in moderation any longer. I want to be able to stay 100% off it now I think. I'll keep going, you only lose when you give up.

Newish to reddit and I see lots of subs regarding pron addiction, it's nice to see communities and support online for this stuff, where IRL it seems impossible to open up. Hoping to learn and improve with everyone!

Guys, I am in my early twenties and I have to share a sad truth with you. I’ve fallen back into binge-eating for hours on end while mindlessly watching porn, wasting time on porn subreddits, and chatting with strangers like some naive simp. Just a moment ago, I was chatting with some random girl. And as I was talking to her, she immediately noticed that I was venting to her about being a loser and my struggles with relationships with women. I can’t blame her for anything; she acted fairly. But it really hits me how bad things are with me I feel like a different person around some people; I feel broken. A week ago, I wrote a post about my biggest relapse I binge-ate for four days. Today, I’ve been binge-eating for just one day, and I’m already sick of it. Fuck. I’m sick of this addiction this fucking shit is worse, worse than I thought. I’m crying again at least this forum is meant for me to vent here. It’s human, but it hurts like hell; I feel an awful mental weight. Did I fall even lower today than last time? I don’t think so; today I’m even more convinced that I need support and have to give up everything to fully recover. Physically, I’m fine, I’m doing the basics like meditation and a lot really, a lot of other things; I’ve been lifting weights and running, and I even keep in touch with my loved ones from time to time. But behind this physical facade, the person who, from the outside, seems happy and healthy, lies my inner self, who is mentally at rock bottom and experiencing a sadness I’ve never felt before in my life. I’m crying as I listen to sad music and write this; I’m not pretending, tears are streaming down my face.

I burst into tears and I’m still crying like a child. I’m begging God or whatever for help; I’m not exaggerating, these are just words, but behind them is me, in the flesh. I know that real emotions are real, no matter how strange that sounds. They hurt like hell, damn it. But I want to find true peace and stop wandering. I’ve been wandering for many years, suppressing my emotions; I’m not my true self, even though I want to be..., it hurts. Fuck. I want to change myself for the better and give the world the best of myself. I want to help, in whatever way I can, those who are experiencing emotional pain and loneliness, whenever I’m ready to do so. I know that a person has to start with themselves. That’s me, I’m crying like a baby, I’ve got snot running down my nose, my face is wet from crying, and I’m blowing my nose into a handkerchief. Sorry for the details. It’s stupid, but I’ve fallen back into self-destructive behavior I’ve barely eaten anything, slept about two hours, haven’t washed, and have been living on the edge but I don’t want to watch porn at all anymore. I’m going to delete everything related to it; I’ll try. I’ll try to take care of myself, the day isn’t over yet. But the loneliness, the lack of understanding, the anger, and the feeling of being misunderstood have hit me really hard. Now I’ve calmed down a bit. I long for a real life, a real relationship, and to discover and experience these difficult emotions without suppressing them any further. All of this happened after my last 6 days of abstinence. Thank you for reading.

TL;DR: Basically, I hit second worst day as someone addicted to technology and pornography. Today, I went through a very intense bout of crying and self-loathing. And I’m sharing this here so I don’t keep it bottled up inside me, even just a little. Thank you.

37m, on the East Coast of the U.S., single, wfh and live on my own (which makes it even more difficult to have any kind of accountability). Like most people on here, I've been struggling with this addiction most of my life. More than anything, I've been using porn and compulsive masturbation to manage my anxiety, but I need to quit. Current goal is to completely abstain from porn and masturbation. At some point in the future I might accept masturbation in moderation.

Other interests: gym, hiking, history, Christianity. I do not consume drugs, alcohol, or tobacco, but I am quite fond of caffeine.

Seeking a buddy or two for daily check-ins. Ideally somebody with some things in common. It doesn't matter how long you've been sober but please be willing to talk about your journey. Thank you!

.

Im 26 years old, addicted since I was 15.

Started watching stuff like Cuckolding Porn and Rule 34 since february and masturbated 3 times a day.

So 3 weeks ago I decided Iam sick and tired of this degrading Crap, so I quit.

Iam really, really, really stressed and I lost 80-90% of my libido since day 4, but Iam very horny at the same time.

How is that possible?

And because of my imaginative, analytical Mind, I see detailed mental Imagery very often during the day and literally cant get them out of my head (Sometimes even really bad, unwanted taboo stuff I used to look at that haunts me), no matter what I try to do, unless I look at pictures of nude women.

Once I look at nudes or pics of normal, pretty, attractive women for only 5 minutes, Im calm again for the next 3 days or so and my Stress is gone.

Wth is happening?

Proud of myself

I’ve probably been watching porn everyday since I was 12 years old in middle school (when I started) of course with the exception of me trying to quit for a hand full of times which isn’t many it’s basically everyday. I’m now a 20 year old grown man still doing the same thing I was doing when I was in middle school and I can’t dodge it for anything it’s now interfering with my life making me late for work at times some times I even call off just to be able to do it all day smh, and it’s now interfering with my performance in the bedroom with my girlfriend and she thinks it’s her and it makes me feel bad when I only know the true reason. I only get a hard to porn not the real thing and that’s so sick and I’ve gotten so far to the point where I only like watching taboo porn genres things I would never do in my personal life as a man and it’s haunts me every day I can’t believe this who I’m now. I never thought I would be addicted to porn and laughed when adults warned us in sex ed class when I was younger I feel so stupid, I’ve gotten fat/out of shape,unmotivated,lost confidence and stopped caring about anything to do with myself anymore. I miss the real me the things I’m watching are eating me alive I don’t want this anymore I’m not a real man I’m just a boy still 😞

If you add up all the time spent with it, how much time have you lost? How much time could have been saved if you’d just done the deed and moved on with your day? How many hours out of your week, days out of your months, months out of your years? Maybe you lost sleep, or wasted your weekend, or put off that fun pastime that’s surely more productive. Was it worth it? If your life ended today, how much of that would have been spent on it?

Just some food for thought.

Be kind to yourself. Don’t give up.

It’s been quite a tough week, but I think i’m nearing the end of it. Just want to feel better in my own skin and build my confidence. If anyone wants to chat or has any advice or words of wisdom it would be greatly appreciated. Hope you’re all well.

I was in a couples therapy session with my wife. We have been going about twice a month for about 5 months. I like the therapist and my wife and I both feel she is a good fit for us. She asked me directly if I have had any relapses in the last 6 month, since my wife mentioned I hit a 6 month milestone the other day.
I have not had a relapse since February, but the direct question made me feel like I needed to confess something. I said no, and I meant it and the therapist asked again, making sure to include "any less serious videos or behaviors" I said no, but I still felt like there must be something I should confess here to her and more importantly my wife, but I really don't feel I have relapsed. Although I did think about a couple times pop up ads came up and I hesitated to click away and never told my wife about. Now I feel guilty that I did not have something to confess in the moment.

Has anyone had a similar experience before?
My best guess is I spent so long in hiding that I feel like I should have something serious to confess.

Logged off wfh work at 6pm and that feeling started to creep up on me. Luckily, I had the presence of mind to quickly put my phone into a timed lockbox for 10 minutes. I figured if that didn’t work, I’d lock it up again for 15, then 30, and so on.

But I just forgot about it. The absentminded urge that started at 6pm was gone. Normally, I’d have gone with it and lost hours, but not tonight.

Posting this as a reminder to myself.

Doing great. Scrolling through media not feeling any urge to bust one when crossing with NSFW stuff. Been out most of the day and my phone is broken so it was just like your regular afternoon 10 years ago not being exposed most of the time. Hanged out at the evening. Hit the gym and kept my calories on track. Might finish my translation project tomorrow once for all.

All Quiet on the Gooning Front.

✅

This is my first post on this sub. I have been watching porn since I was 11 and I have tried multiple times to stop this habit before but to no avail. This time I hope I can free myself from porn